By Yvonne Moss
Subzero nights bring
Stabbing chill but warms to ice
Ensues a heatwave.
My mind’s awareness
Never sleeping with windchill
Intensifies it.
By Yvonne Moss
Subzero nights bring
Stabbing chill but warms to ice
Ensues a heatwave.
My mind’s awareness
Never sleeping with windchill
Intensifies it.
By Nan Potts
The cold that measures records, breaks
The lows below the zero makes
And climbs to where a heatwave slakes,
The body and the mind.
Then from Fahrenheit to Centigrade
Once calculated and overlaid
In numbers temps do escalade,
Obverse sums of their mate’s.
But,
At minus forty a plan contrived
A doppelgänger is revived
Conversion as equals strived,
Asymmetry no more.
By Robert Lyons
Oh, the pain, this suffering, this cage, it was too much to bare,
The rage, the endless malevolence, the uncaring, my cup always empty
then one morning I didn’t wake up, and it wasnt there,
niether am I I thought, unaware, smiling ear to ear,
Now having plenty, unhindered up here
By Sharon Ann Jaeger
He is her pillar of fire, her cloud of glory
trunk and branches her tree of knowledge
the burning bush from which God speaks unconsumed
though the flame shines from afar
the night seems darker still
and death, dark and alone presses heavily
where the weight of love’s body once enclosed her
By Haley Keil
I stand there staring
a tree so tall I cannot see the top
shinning beads of light scattered on never ending branches
emitting memories
smells of freshly baked muffins
gooey chocolate chips and pumpkin spice
my mother smiling from the kitchen
licking frosting from our fingertips
the sound of my best friends laugh
the warmth of my childhood cat
memories captured in time
enveloped in tiny crystals
clinging to branches
the excitement from my first swim meet and dance performance
the feeling of rain and a good book
I keep them here
in my tree of glittering diamonds
memories captured from days gone by
By Katherine Baker
Forming, swarming, blackened sculptures,
overhead, intrusive vultures,
bulging with imminent rupture.
Silhouettes merging, diverging,
back and forth in silent surging,
responding to nature's urging.
Branches shiver, quiver, wither,
in a rush, the shadows slither,
leaves afloat abandoned river.
Shading, fading, graying 'til none,
passing restlessly from the sun,
the chilling whispers - summer's done.
By Charles Dean Walker
Living my dream in reality, but it ain’t going the way I thought it would.
Now I’ve self published my first book of poetry.
Hopes, Dreams, And Worries.
It felt amazing to see myself selling for the first few days on Amazon.
However I made not a dime.
It’s alright to me, it’s apart of the promotion.
Now nobody’s knowing it’s out there.
Am I a failure?
Probably.
But perhaps I can gain the attention to readers, by going back to where my art first
showed.
A place where thousands read for free.
Whether this book fails or not, my art doesn’t stop.
FOZIE:
Contributed by G.B. Jones
There is a lovable seven-year-old retired sled dog who is in need of a good home!
Meet Fozie, an Alaska Husky who trained for the Iditarod Sled Dog Race, and who has ran thousands of miles in harness. Fozie now seeks a home where he can get more human interaction. He is good with other dogs and people. He is in great health and is current on his vaccinations. He has been microchipped.
We want Fozie to be the member of a new forever home. Fozie is not house trained, but with some patience, he could be! Fozie would be a great dog to go jogging or biking with! He is high energy and a very strong dog! Fozie would be great to go on walks with, but needs more leash training!
There is a $100 rehoming fee to get Fozie, and that goes back to the dogs. If Fozie does not work out for any reason, the rehoming fee is refunded. Fozie is currently housed at the Iditarod Trail Kennel in Knik!
If you would like to meet this incredible dog, send us an email to: thealaskangardens@gmail.com
PERRY:
Contributed by G.B. Jones
Meet seven-year-old Perry, an Alaska Husky who trained for the world renown Iditarod Sled Dog Race, and who has raced thousands of miles throughout Alaska’s vast trail system. Perry seeks a home where he can get more one on one human interaction. He is great with other dogs and good with people. He is in great health, and is current on his vaccinations. He has been microchipped.
We want Perry to be the best dog he can be, and this dog needs a good home now. This is someone’s opportunity to get a new family member, and although Perry is not house trained, you can house train older dogs. Perry is the dog to go jogging or biking with! Although somewhat squirrely on a leash, he can and will adapt to your pace on your walkabouts.
There is a $100 rehoming fee to get Perry, and that goes back to the dogs. If Perry does not work out for any reason, the rehoming fee is refunded. Perry is currently housed at the Iditarod Trail Kennel in Knik! If you would like to meet this incredible dog, send us an email to: thealaskangardens@gmail.com
Contributed by Sharon Aubrey
If you’ve ever wanted to improve your craft as a writer or illustrator and/or wanted to network with literary agents, editors, and other professional writers and illustrators, this month is your chance! Alaska Writers Guild’s 2022 Conference for Writers & Illustrators will be held in Anchorage on Friday, September 30th and Saturday, October 1st at the Loussac Library Event Center. This annual conference is organized with support from the Alaska chapters of Romance Writers of America and the Society of Children’s Book Writers and Illustrators.
Over two days, there are numerous break-out sessions allowing participants to select from a menu of professional resources to best meet their individual literary objectives. This year’s conference keynote speaker is William “Bill” Kenower, visiting from South Carolina. He is a professional author, editor, and host of the Author2Author podcast. On Friday, Bill will teach “Fearless Writing” and “Fearless Marketing.” Additionally, other Friday sessions will include several literary agents helping authors improve their publishing game plan and refine their pitches for increased success. Later in the day, Alaska’s children’s book author and former AWG president, Brooke Hartman, will present a session on writing children’s picture books. To wrap up the day, New York Times bestselling editor Angela James will present on avoiding common missteps in your professional author career.
On Saturday, Bill Kenower will also host a session called “Failure to Launch” for authors who have hit a slump in their writing journey and could use some new strategies to achieve greater success. Saturday’s lineup also includes a variety of editors from New York, literary agents from California, and numerous local publishing directors, editors, and authors, including AWG President Caitlin Buxbaum and AWG Digital Outreach Director Lorna Rose. The presentations will explore diverse topics, including: creating a small press; perfecting your proposal and pitch; acquiring an agent; the art of illustrating and working as an illustrator; and honing your craft through workshops on writing tension, perfecting dialogue, building the reader-character connection, crafting memoirs, and developing good free verse poetry.
In addition to the various professional workshops and break-out sessions, the time spent networking during lunch and other breaks present a wonderful opportunity to build relationships with other locals. It’s exciting to talk with your literary peers working on various projects in different genres. Both prospective and professional authors and illustrators will be rewarded by exploring new ideas, sharing methods for success, and learning new apps or tools others are using.
For more information about attending, please visit the Alaska Writers Guild website: https://www.alaskawritersguild.com/Conference
Image caption: Artwork by SCBWI member Denise Gallagher, Conference Illustration Contest winner.
Contributed by Drewcilla Holifield
Mat-Su Concert Band celebrates the strength of our musical connection to the community with a fall concert after a hiatus of more than two years.
The “Strike Up the Band … Again” concert takes place at 7:30 p.m. Saturday, Oct. 1 at the Glenn Massay Theater at Mat-Su College. Tickets are $20 for general admission and $5 for students. Children under 5 get in free. Tickets can be purchased online at www.matsuconcertband.org.
The band, made up of about 70 members under the baton of director Gleo Huyck, last played together in early 2020, before pandemic restrictions temporarily ended rehearsals.
This fall concert combines band classics – and yes, there are a few marches – with several less traditional compositions and a virtuoso piece: Alfred Reed’s “Ode for Trumpet” featuring soloist Doug Sheaffer.
The program includes the Ukrainian National Anthem (“Shche Ne Vmerla Ukrany”) by Mykailo Verbytsky. A tune that has emerged as a symbol of unity as the Russian invasion of Ukraine continues, the anthem originated with a 19th century poem titled “Ukraine Is Not Dead Yet” which was set to music, according to the National Anthems Info website. Performances were banned in 1922 when Ukraine became part of the Soviet Union but the anthem was restored when Ukraine regained its independence upon the breakup of the Soviet Union in 1992.
The concert features several more contemplative pieces to match the season. Joseph Kosma’s “Autumn Leaves” is an iconic jazz ballad in an arrangement by Alfred Reed that showcases the rich harmonic language underlining the melody with a “masterful thick and sonorous orchestration,” according to the publisher’s program notes.
Composer Julie Giroux dedicated “One Life Beautiful” to the memory of Heather Cramer Reu, who died at 42 while riding her bicycle in New Mexico. “The title itself is a double-entendre which in one sense is referring to the person this work is dedicated to as in “one life” that was beautifully lived,” Giroux’s own program notes say. “The other sense is a direct observation concluding that having only one life is what makes life so sacred, tragic and so very precious.”
The band will also perform classics including Frank Erickson’s “Toccata for Band” – conducted by assistant director Shawn Campbell – and Irving Berlin’s “Alexander’s Ragtime Band” as well as “America the Beautiful” and selections from the musical “Chicago”.
Mat-Su Concert Band got its start in 1984 as the Mat-Su Community Band, formed by Matanuska Music owner Hank Hartman. Other directors have included Neil Long and Phil Munger.
Current director Huyck is a retired music educator and private instructor. Under his baton, the band performs a wide-ranging selection of challenging music. The band this season numbers about 70 amateur musicians who assemble every Monday night for rehearsals at Teeland Middle School.
Contributed by Rebecca Goodrich
There’s a name for people who write a memoir: time traveler. Anyone who’s even attempted to write a memoir of any sort must delve into the past, with all its pain and joy. It’s often a perilous adventure, to do that personal archaeology and discover much—beautiful and heart-breaking both—you didn’t even suspect of lying beneath the surface.
As some of you know, I wrote a memoir, finishing the draft in 2019. Then I thought I’d pop down to Arizona for a bit.
Some great ideas are destined to turn out not-so-great. In October 2019 I left Alaska for what I thought would be a two-year stint in Sun City, Arizona. I knew already I wouldn’t like the heat but wasn’t there for the climate. I moved 2670 miles closer to family and friends I didn’t see often. It will be fun, I thought. It will be easy, I thought.
With ten times the population of Alaska, there were possibilities of meeting many nice creative folks, and I planned to do lots of writing and editing.
Those cheer-leading phrases in my brain knew nothing about the future. Nobody knew there would be a worldwide pandemic. (I didn’t do well with quarantine, doing little or no writing or editing.) Nor did I imagine I’d get breast cancer, requiring a third year in a distant place to start and finish treatment.
But when you get cancer, you hop on that horse and ride that bronco as long as you must. I did eventually meet lots of nice creative folks, just mostly over Zoom.
Cirque literary journal published a chapter of my forthcoming memoir last year. This year that chapter received first place at national level competition run by National Federation of Press Women, an 85-year-old organization, with chapters in Alaska since 1961. See link: https://arizonaprofessionalwriters.org/2022/06/28/rebecca-goodrich-nfpw-award-winner/
Even better, you can read that memoir chapter for free online. Go to cirquejournal.com. Click on Back Issues. Look for Volume 11, No. 2, with the painting of the red salmon on the cover. Check the table of contents for non-fiction and you’ll see my name, and well, you know the drill.
In further book news, the chapbook about my father, Emergency Rations: How One Young Tail Gunner Survived World War Two, is under consideration at Fathom Publishing in Anchorage. Currently it’s available as an eBook on Smashwords.com.
Finally, now, this time traveler has packed up her laptop and her cat, to return to “the brilliant stars in the northern sky.” It will be a ground-kissing moment.
See you end of September. I’ll be staying in Wasilla initially, hanging my Consulting Editor shingle up in the Great Land once again.
Consulting editor and author Rebecca Goodrich forsook the fool’s gold of California to build a houseboat in Dutch Harbor in 1994. In 1998 she moved with her family to Anchorage, and in 1999, to Wasilla for three years. Active in Alaska’s literary community since touching down on Amaknak Island, feel free to contact Goodrich by phone: 480-682-7520, or email: scribing@hotmail.com.
Contributed by Valley Performing Arts
In the Baptist backwoods of the Bible Belt, the beleaguered Turpin family proves that living and dying in the South is seldom tidy and always hilarious. Despite their earnest efforts to pull themselves together for their father’s funeral, the Turpins’ other problems keep overshadowing the solemn occasion. Amid the chaos of rising funeral costs, a pack of no‐neck monster kids, possible infidelity in the family car and junk food binges, the Turpins find comfort in their friends and neighbors, an eccentric community of misfits who just manage to pull together and help each other through their hours of need, and finally, the funeral.
Valley Performing Arts is proud to present this season‐opening comedy full of heart and laughter. Co‐ written by one of the screen writers of NBC’s The Golden Girls, this play is sure to tickle your funny bone and more. Come join the FUN with VPA!
DEARLY DEPARTED opens September 16h and runs through October 2nd. Ticket prices are $19 Regular Admission, $17 Seniors 65+/Students 18 and younger. The production will be at Valley Performing Arts, 251 W. Swanson Avenue, in Wasilla.
Purchase tickets online at www.valleyperformingarts.org or call our office at 373‐0195 for more information. Be sure to follow us on Facebook at: www.facebook.com/Valley‐Performing‐Arts.
Contributed by Musk Ox Farm
“Awe-inspiring detail of the frigid Alaskan landscape and its creatures will enchant readers.” - School Library Journal
With over 44 million books in print, JAN BRETT’s exquisite art is universally recognized as being among the finest in children’s books today. For over 40 years, she has brought highly-praised folktale retellings to millions of youngsters, their teachers, and parents.
The Musk Ox Farm was honored to work with Jan on her first musk ox book, "Cozy," and are thrilled that Cozy is coming back, better than ever, and this time with a new friend.
Set in Alaska, COZY IN LOVE (G.P. Putnam’s Sons; on sale November 8, 2022) is a gorgeous reimagining of the classic folktale, The Crow and the Pitcher. No one does winter like Jan Brett. The Alaskan landscape and animals will delight teachers, librarians, and kids. After a defeat in a battle of strength, Cozy is convinced he’ll never impress radiant Lofti. But while he is sulking, he learns of a bigger concern—his friend Bella the beluga whale is about to get trapped in fast-forming ice. Cozy races to the inlet, where Bella is in trouble. Luckily, he thinks of a new way to use his strong legs and tough horns to help save her.
Cozy, the lovable musk ox, shows how helping your friends is always the right thing to do— no matter who is watching. Brett’s art is inspired by expeditions to Alaska, where she encountered musk oxen in the Matanuska Valley, horned puffins playing at a waterfall on Fox Island in Resurrection Bay, and a charming pod of beluga whales carrying seaweed on their heads in Turnagain Arm.
Jan Brett, one of the most prolific children’s book authors and illustrators, is following her recent bestseller, COZY (the musk ox!) with a follow-up, COZY IN LOVE! This dear friend of the Musk Ox Farm is offering a rare opportunity to have her sign and personalize your copy so that it’s available on the release date of November 8th. Get your personalized copy at muskoxfarm.org/musk-ox-books, available while supplies last.
Comedy, music, skits, and more, coming to you Saturday, October 22, from the historic Museum of Alaska Transportation!
Read moreContributed by Elizabeth Holmgren
September and October include two dates that raise awareness around mental health challenges: World Suicide Prevention Day is September 10 and World Mental Health Day is October 10. According to Dustin Morris, Area Director for the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention- Alaska Chapter, “Alaska has some of the highest suicide rates in the nation; connecting individuals with mental health services and resources is a vital component in suicide prevention.” In Alaska we have a youth population that is particularly vulnerable to suicide. ADN reported 12/15/21: “Alaska’s average annual adolescent suicide rate from 2016 to 2019 was about three times higher than the national average.”
There is something occurring globally and locally to offer assistance.
In response to the global decline in mental health, Access Consciousness®, a global personal empowerment movement present in over 176 countries, announced the return of its mental health support initiative “You Are Not Alone” for October-November. Practitioners of Access Bars, a fast-growing and light touch gentle treatment, will offer complimentary Access Bars sessions, opening their doors to anyone seeking hope and some ease, especially with the increase in anxiety and depression in the wake of Covid 19. Access Bars has been shown to help with the feelings of isolation, overwhelm and depression. This treatment utilizes points on the head to release the electro-magnetic components of
stress, thought and emotion, and has brought relief to thousands internationally.
Locally, if you would like to experience a complimentary Access Bars session, there will be two public “You Are Not Alone” Access Bars clinics, where Alaskans who are Access Bars practitioners are volunteering their services and welcome you to a session! Two local businesses have generously offered to host. The first is Life Family Chiropractic in Wasilla on Sunday, September 25, 10-4. The second is Joule Wellness in Anchorage on Saturday, October 1, 12-5.
In addition to offering complimentary Access Bars sessions, there is a “You Are Not Alone” website with Stories of Change, www.tinyurl.com/youarenotalone907, which features a video series to inspire others and invite them to experience a different possibility.
Spearheaded by Dr. Dain Heer, the Stories of Change series featuring Access
Consciousness facilitators was launched in an effort to break the stigma around showing vulnerability and shed light on feelings of unworthiness and mental health challenges such as depression, anxiety and PTSD. In addition, positive stories of those who have found support and relief in Access Bars will be shared.
Scientific research by Dr. Terrie Hope PhD, DNM, CFMW, published in the Journal of Energy Psychology: Theory, Research, and Treatment, has revealed the results of one 90-minute Access Bars session indicated a significant decrease in the severity of depression and anxiety.
Dr. Dain Heer, an internationally renowned speaker, author and co-creator of Access Consciousness explains how Access Bars saved his life. “Soon after setting the date of my suicide, I discovered Access Bars and one session of this simple energy technique allowed me to know that everything was okay, everything always had been, and everything always would be. It changed my whole life,” remarks Heer.
Access Bars has assisted thousands of people to improve many aspects of their body and life including insomnia, anxiety, depression, stress, panic attacks, PTSD and OCD. The effects of Access Bars are individual to each person and differ from session to session. In addition to improved physical health, recipients have reported greater intuitive awareness, more gratitude, ease, kindness, peace and calm. At worst, people feel like they have just had a pleasant rest, at best their whole life can change into something greater with total ease.
An Access Bars session usually lasts for roughly 60 minutes and is a process you can
undertake as a one-time session, or a monthly, weekly or even daily experience.
For more information and to find your nearest practitioner, visit www.accessconsciousness.com/youarenotalone or locally for questions contact Elisabeth Holmgren, Access Bars Facilitator, at joyousbody@gmail.com.
Contributed by Sally Barnes
Are you afraid to exercise? Do you feel stuck and limited due to the use of a wheelchair, walker, or cane? Do you feel like there is nothing you can do in the way of exercise? Think again!!
Here in Club50 at the Wasilla Area Senior Center we have classes to fit all ranges of mobility. All our classes can be modified to fit your needs. From chair yoga and Strong Seniors, to Bingocize, Tai Chi and NIA52. We even have hula hoops and 3-wheel bicycles! All our programs are designed with the health and welfare of seniors in mind.
We have various pieces of workout equipment to fit most physical therapy needs as well.
This month’s profile is on our NIA52 classes.
What is NIA?
Nia is a program based on the practice of movements that draws from dance, martial arts and healing arts, such as yoga. Classes are done bare-foot and with very upbeat music. More than 45 countries participate in this lively class weekly! Every class can be designed to your individual needs and fitness level.
Every class offers a unique combination of 52 moves that correspond to the main areas of the body such as the base, the core, and the upper extremities. Beginners and elite athletes alike can adapt NIA to meet their needs.
NIA was created with the belief that a community of healthy people will grow to do great things. The belief is that every person can discover, unleash, explore, and enhance their potential to live a fulfilling and meaningful life by listening to their bodies and engaging their senses.
This class is taught by Linda Volkman who holds a certification as a Nia Blue Belt Instructor. In addition to NIA, Linda is also a certified Foot Reflexologist, having graduated in 2013.
NIA classes are at 2:15 each Thursday except for the first Thursday of the month at which time the class starts at 3pm. Stop in an enjoy a free class!
For more information, contact Club50 at 907-206-8807.
Contributed by Diana L. Straub
Hello Neighbors,
I am thrilled to announce I have joined the wellness team at Altair Integrative Wellness Center on the Palmer Wasilla Highway near the Post Office Annex. Now you can schedule appointments for skincare services with me on Fridays and continue using your favorite Mary Kay skincare products or select from other available choices.
Karin Chapman the “Waxing Queen” has also joined the Altair Integrative Wellness team. Karin will be providing all aesthetic services, but if you have been missing the “Wax Queen” this is where you will find her on Wednesdays only.
Autumn is the time to prep your skin for the coming weather: wind, dropping temperatures, dry air and snow are all contributing factors to uncomfortable and inflamed skin. September and October are a good time to meet with your Aesthetician, Physician, or Dermatologist for a facial, microdermabrasion or even a chemical peel for an appropriate level for your skins condition.
What is a Microdermabrasion Treatment?
Microdermabrasion is a service provided by an Aesthetician, R.N., Physician, or Dermatologist to gently resurface the top layer of skin. Microdermabrasion is achieved with a minimally abrasive wand that scrubs your skin with fine crystals gently sloughing off the dull, lifeless, damaged and/or flaking skin. The Microdermabrasion wand vacuums away the debris while the vacuum encourages the production of collagen, restoring a finer texture and improved firmness to your skin. A perfect treatment to jump-start any skincare routine.
Who Would Have a Microdermabrasion Treatment?
Men, women, and teens are candidates for successful Microdermabrasion treatments because the treatments address a variety of specific skin conditions, including:
Superficial scaring
Acne scaring
Stretch marks
Blackheads
Enlarged pores
Skin discoloration
Sun damage
Age or sun spots
Fine facial lines
Wrinkles
Excessive skin cell build up
Other body areas
The Aesthetic Benefits of Microdermabrasion
A single Microdermabrasion treatment provides temporary results lasting several weeks with a good at home skincare routine. A series of treatments with a good at home skincare routine will provide much longer lasting results such as:
Faded scars
Firmer, tighter skin
Cleaner-looking skin
More radiant complexion
I strongly believe when you are more comfortable with your appearance, you are more confident.
Why is Microdermabrasion called the “Lunchtime Facial”?
Business men, women, began calling this treatment the “Lunchtime Facial“ because this service can be provided in as little as 30 minutes. This meant they could leave work during lunch, have the treatment and return to work before lunch was over. Remember! This treatment can be added to your favorite 60-minute facial for maximum comfort and enjoyment. Enjoy a “lunchtime” or Pumpkin facial during the months of September and October at Altair Integrative Wellness on Wednesdays or Fridays by calling 907-357-1818 to schedule your appointment.
Diana L. Straub
Licensed Aesthetician
Licensed Cosmetologist
Mary Kay Independent Beauty Consultant
Contributed by Vicki Randolph
Are you a drug user? Do you think your life doesn’t matter? Do you think that if you take your own life, no one will miss you? If you answered yes to any question, please read on.
This is my letter to my younger brother Johnny, written to him on what would have been his 61st birthday. On the morning of April 20, 1989, still drunk and high from the night before, Johnny died by suicide. He was 27.
My dearest brother Johnny, It’s been 34 years. 34 years since the day you decided that your life didn’t matter. 34 years since the morning you decision forever darkened my world, and our mother’s world, and your 7-year-old niece’s world, and our brother’s world, and all your friends’ world. 34 years since you left a mark that influenced five more young men in our small community to take their own life. 34 years since the families and friends of those five young men were forever darkened like ours has been. Six families, and who knows how many people have been forever saddened because of the strangle hold the drugs had on you. 34 years since the State Trooper I had pleaded with to arrest you and get you off the street and into rehab was the first responder to your suicide. 34 years since that Trooper openly wept over you--a young man he never met. 34 years since that Trooper hung up his badge. So many lives were permanently impacted by your decision to end your life. You’ve now been dead longer than you were alive. I miss you. Every day, I still miss you.
34 years. 1,737 weeks. 12,163 days. 291,912 hours. 17,514,720 minutes. 1,050,883,200 seconds. Not one of those seconds has been better without you. Not one of those minutes has been complete without you. Not one of those hours has been spent without a sense of loss. Not one of those days has gone by without me missing you. Not one of those years have gone by without tears…. still missing you.
I want to believe that had you waited one more day, you would have figured a way out of your hell. I want to believe that had you seen in my daughter’s eyes, in my eyes, in our mother’s eyes, in your friends’ eyes, how much we loved you and wanted to help you, you would have waited one more day. I want to believe that you were bigger than the drugs that twisted your mind, numbed your feelings and white-washed your memories. I want to believe that, given one more day, you would have eventually found a place where you were content without trying to escape. Just one more day…
They say that time heals all pain. That’s a lie! Whoever said that never lost someone they loved to suicide. Time does not heal all pain. I have simply learned to live with its constant dark shadow hanging around my heart. There is a Johnny-shaped hole in my entire world. Some days are OK--no tears, just an emptiness in my life where you once stood. I miss you. I miss your quirky smile. I miss your bear hugs. I miss the way you— my little brother—somehow felt the need to protect me--your older sister. I miss your face. I miss that kind heart of yours that was bigger than you are. I miss seeing what you’ve made with your talented hands. I miss arguing opinions with you. I miss you so much it hurts—my heart still hurts. Some days, like today, I hear a song that was popular when you died, and I turn into a puddle. The pain is raw. It is always there. I look at the beautiful spring day unfolding before me and wonder what you would see if you were looking at it with me. Would you notice the pussy willows? Or would you focus on the dry highway pavement calling you to ride your Harley? Would you turn your face toward the sky as I do, relishing in the warmth of sun? Would you be anxious to ride the road and hike the hills of Hatcher Pass? Would you be planning your fishing trips?
Just one more day. Johnny, I want just one more day. Each day, every morning, I would then ask you for another day….and maybe, some 12,163 days later, you would be here enjoying a beautiful day with me, and with your niece who adored you. 34 years have gone by, and I still miss you….so very much.
Your sis, Vicki.