Finding Stillness in the Storm: Anchorage Musician’s Journey Through Darkness to Light
Contributed by John Larson, John's Home Studio
When Anchorage musician John Larson opens his upcoming album "Through The Stillness, Through The Dark" with sounds that simulate psychosis, he's not making an abstract artistic statement. He's translating lived experience into music, pulling something beautiful from the chaos that once consumed his mind.
"I set up some microphones and just improvised for hours until I had a huge collection of sounds to process," Larson explains of creating the opening track "Brain State 0_1." "At the time a lot of those thoughts were larger than life. They really consumed me. I would catch on to a thought that felt good and true and would follow it until it ripped my world apart."
The process of sculpting that opening piece - hours of automating volume and panning until it felt just right - became something magical. "I had pulled out my worries and troubles and had painted something beautiful with it," he says.
That transformation from chaos to art mirrors Larson's nearly two-decade journey through mental health crisis, war trauma from serving as an infantryman in Iraq, homelessness, addiction, and ultimately recovery. The 15-track album, releasing July 31st, chronicles this path with track titles that read like chapters: "The Mind Collapses," "Stumble Onward," "Shedding Of The Old Skin," and finally "Into The Fading Sunlight."
"Recovery is an ongoing process so there are always things that evolve if you are on the right path," Larson reflects. "The album ends on a question and a retreat back into old patterns. It's hard to know where to go when you just want to hide from the light."
Larson's lowest point came in 2016 when a manic episode cost him his job, home, and car. After being kicked out of his parents' house and spending terrifying nights at the homeless shelter, he finally found the courage to seek help. "One day on a Friday afternoon I had had enough. I went to the VA and said I needed help."
The path to stability took years. After multiple hospitalizations and failed medications, he finally found treatment that worked. His therapist's parting words proved prophetic: "Focus on the music and everything will fall into place for you."
"That's when the music really started to heal me," Larson says. "I was able to quit smoking, quit weed and eventually started volunteering because I was finally out of survival mode."
Alaska's extreme seasons deeply influence his sound. Winter nights walking through his snow-covered neighborhood provide the album's contemplative stillness. "It just becomes so quiet and so still, like the world has stopped just for me to journey around in it," he describes. Summer brings the opposite energy - "loud, energetic, movement" - creating the emotional peaks that balance the introspective valleys.
The album features collaborations with local musicians Katie Wasko, Brett Lindsay, Matt Hansen, James Daggett, and Mercy Cofield. "Katie and Brett are fantastic improvisers. Everything they recorded with me was written on the spot," Larson notes, including one piece in the challenging 11/4 time signature they navigated naturally.
Already gaining local recognition through Alaska Public Media's "Indie Alaska" program and currently under review consideration at A Closer Listen, a respected instrumental music publication, Larson's work demonstrates how art can transform the darkest experiences into something meaningful. As someone who now works helping families in crisis, he understands the power of bringing light into difficult moments.
"Through The Stillness, Through The Dark" will be available July 31st on band camp and streaming services everywhere and proves that sometimes the most beautiful music comes from the hardest journeys.
Find John Larson's music at: johnlarsonak.bandcamp.com